things are so much more different when your in love,
when you fall out of love,
when your broken and left in pieces because of love,
all those different types and stages of love, the good and the bad.
however, im happy to say that
im happily in love with my boyfriend
i think im finally not afraid to say that i am not afraid of being in love
because, ive had bad experiences before
and ive told him about these experiences
and he understood
and he never once pressured me into doing one single thing
something ive always been grateful for and
i dont think ive ever actually told him
which i should but regardless
hes been there for me
when i feel lonely and afraid and whenever i feel at my lowest
hes there, hugging me, consoling me, helping me feel better
the times i cry
hes there holding me, letting me let it out, because i never do
i never cry in front of anyone, not my parents, not my friends, not anyone.
because they want explainations
and sometimes i cant explain things because it would require information that
i dont want to give out or explain.
because no one sticks around long enough to give a shit.
but, he has.
and, i do have friends that know things, that i can talk to.
but none of them know my entire story, not like my boyfriend does. not like my stuart does.
and im so grateful and so happy and just
i love him so much
ive told him
im not afraid to say it to anyone anymore